Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize
