fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
