please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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