I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
