For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
