i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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