you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
