but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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