This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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