that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
