So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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