he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
