No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
