nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
