"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
