I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
