"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
