I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
