Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
nutella sex= disaster
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize