If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
