i can't believe i had my finger in that
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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