Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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