I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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