Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
