You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize