Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
