I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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