thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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