The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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