guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
