It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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