He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
