Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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