i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Randomize
