I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
