Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize