i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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