if i died would you start the facebook group?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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