I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
is it fun? or sober?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
