I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize