Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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