i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Randomize
