mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Did you pee in the oven last night??
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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