I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
How does it feel to date your dad?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize