if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Who died my cat blue again?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
