So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize