can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize