You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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