Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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