did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
