The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
The adults are the big ones right?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
