We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
