It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
